Well…. No, I lied, in the early days of the spoof (see “Airplane!”, “Young Frankenstein” or “High Anxiety”) it was genuinely, bone-ticklingly funny. Then what happened to the classic spoof? I’ll tell you what happened to it, Jason Freidberg and Aaron Seltzer happened to it! They’re the monsters behind the “Scary Movie” series, “Epic Movie”, “Superhero Movie” and “Date Movie”… and now they’re bringing us “Vampires Suck”, a pastiche of the slew of vampire movies coming out of Hollywood now.
See if you crack a genuine smile:
I can’t believe there’s a joke in there about ordering Chinese food, that’s just a bit sick, right? Urk, it kinda goes downhill. Is the opening shot meant to be like “The Shining” or something? Why is Lady Gaga in there? Why does Alice get shot? Scratch that: why the heck is Alice even in there anyway? The only bit I thought was even remotely funny was when that guy took his shirt off and said that it was in his contract to take it off every ten minutes: it’s true, so it brought a little smile to the face.
But that was it! Prove me wrong people, tell me why this should be allowed to exist in the filmic world other than to entertain the lowest common denominator! I will defy you to find a more terrible film this year, and if you do find one, then it’s been a bleak year for the screen people!